


Honey, I love you~!

by 11yeong1



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, Other, POV 707 | Choi Luciel, Reset Theory (Mystic Messenger), So much angst, but also a smidgen of fluff, gender neutral reader, i can't say if it's a happy ending but... it's an ending haha, i haven't played 707's route before so i hope i didn't mess it up, this fic has a lot of words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:08:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24388684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/11yeong1/pseuds/11yeong1
Summary: "Why doesn't the reset affect me? Why am I the only one?" Seven slammed a fist on his desk, rattling his keyboard and mouse. "I'm so tired. Please make me forget, too."Seven doesn’t even know who he’s praying to right now, only that his hands are tightly clasped together, phone on his desk with the screen left on, his body leaning forward with his elbows digging into his thighs as he rocks himself back and forth.
Relationships: 707 | Choi Luciel/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 67





	Honey, I love you~!

**Author's Note:**

> please leave comments after you read!! i wanna know what you think

Right now on the road with you, Seven’s heart was pounding in his chest. The reason being equal parts exhilaration by the idea of being alone with you while the RFA party was being held someplace else and also fear of the reason you were both absent from the party. Seven can hardly believe that you’re with him on his way to look for Saeran and Vanderwood and it’s already been a few hours now. He’s still having a hard time taking in your form beside him even though he’s met you even before the party.

Seven doesn’t miss a single detail. He takes everything into account, from the way the sun makes your hair look more vibrant to the weight and sound of your footsteps that seemed to echo in his mind. He makes sure he doesn’t leave an inch of you unseen by his eyes because his mind may be clogged with entangled ideas on how to search for his brother but looking at you made him feel like he can breathe fine and that it’s okay to pull himself away from any device and any hacking equipment he’s always fiddling with.

Because of this, Seven’s fist clenches and unclenches around the steering wheel as he fights the urge to just wrap his hands around your own. Of course, he still can’t help but want to have something for his hands to hold and fidget with but your hand would be the most suitable for that, he thinks. But at the moment, he wants to prove to himself that you are beside him and that you were both there in the present because looking at you, Seven knew this moment could only last for a few more hours, maybe only minutes even.

 _Please don’t reset… not yet…_ he thinks to himself.

> “Saeyoung…” Seven hears you murmur to yourself, startling him and making his hand freeze beside him. He didn’t even realize he was slowly reaching over to you until that moment. This makes his heart beat faster. It was not as if he wasn’t the one who asked you to call him Saeyoung now. He’s just impossibly thrilled now to hear his real name spoken by someone else--no, someone _important_ \--and yet, ironically he is still not used to getting called by his real name.
> 
> “Yeah?” he answers.
> 
> “Oh, I was just trying it out.” You turn to him and laugh nervously, putting your hand up to dismiss the growing curiosity forming on Seven’s face. Facing forward now again, staring ahead while you repeatedly call Seven’s name. _“Saeyoung, Saeyoung… Saeyoung.”_

Seven smiles to himself, welcoming a tidal wave of a newfound fondness for you to clash straight into his chest. You seemed so serious as you called Seven’s name over and over like a chant or a mantra.

> “My name is gonna lose its meaning if you keep saying it.” Seven tried to laugh lightly but a pained sound escaped from his throat and burst out of his mouth. _This is it_ , he thinks. _The minute I care, you’ll disappear._

Just how many times has he lived this exact moment? How many times had you caused his heart to pick up its pace? Seven never kept count because just thinking about you coming back to the chatroom over and over made his head spin. Sometimes, he feels angry that he’s the only one that remembers all of it happening; that certainly was the case when you first reset and then came back the next day with no recollection of what happened before. The other RFA members all thought he was losing his mind. The only comfort Seven had was when Zen told the story of his dream… of you being the only one real among them. Reading the chat log for that conversation stroked the frustrations out of Seven’s mind. Zen’s consciousness wasn’t as solid as his own but it was still a hint of consciousness Seven was grateful for.

And then on other times, he's just so grateful for all the 11 days you spend favouring him and only him that he forgets about the bitterness that follows it. Because even though there never came a 12th day, it was enough for him to know you loved him. And so he cherishes those 11 days and keeps them safe in his mind's version of a floppy disk similar to the one he has containing all his memories with Saeran. To Seven, as far as he was concerned, he's only ever lived the life he wants for 11 days.

But with the seriousness of their task at hand, Seven itching to find Saeran and Vanderwood and trying to drown out the growing fear that latched itself on Seven’s back--that you will disappear any moment now like every other past version of this same moment--Seven couldn’t help but sigh too loudly. There was a race between his hopefulness and his desire to submit to defeat going on within him right now and the latter was winning.

Right now, Seven could feel the game starting to reset. It will hit him last because the main character always comes last as he once said in one of the chatrooms. It was chasing after him and no matter how hard he steps on the gas, even if the pedal breaks, he can’t outrun it.

You will be taken away like always once the RFA party reaches its climax.

It’s happened so many times now that Seven is sure the reason why you keep being taken away from him is because he loves you so much. He’ll never tell you this but those days when he pushes you away? It wasn’t for safety. It was for his selfishness. _Maybe if I don’t love you, the game will let you stay._ He desperately thinks to himself. _Yes, that’s it._

But it never works that way because every single time, on the last day, you reset and you leave him behind. All the data he has on you gets ripped apart from him and all that’s left with him are his own mental recollections of what happened. Seven is surprised it hasn’t driven him mad at this point but he doesn’t doubt that it will one day.

> “Saeyoung~” You playfully call him again, making him swallow deeply at the tone of your voice and how coy it sounded. Matching it with the smile you wore on your face? Seven was about to implode.
> 
> “Geez, Y/N, do you like it that much?”
> 
> “I like _you_ that much.” you scoffed, proud with your response.

Seven turns to you and drinks all of your features in. He's making sure he remembers the look in your eyes before they cease to recognize him. Seven is committing to his memory this version of you… the one so in love with him. And last, he makes sure to play your voice in his mind over and over so he won't forget it.

> Unable to draw himself away from his fears and worries, Saeyoung chokes, “Y/N, I…”

When you frown, Seven blames himself and when the air gets thick with tension, Seven kicks himself mentally for it. He shifts his attention from you to watching his own leg bouncing up and down like he wants to run away but knows that he can’t, like a runner in a baton relay who’s waiting for his teammate to pass the baton to him.

> “I know, Saeyoung.” You tell him, voice soft and gentle like your touch when you reach for his forearm and give him a little squeeze. “Me too.”

A silence settles in the atmosphere all around Seven which makes him bow his head. The reset is always so quiet. It was swift, too. It doesn’t allow him to breathe, it doesn’t give him time to speak, and it doesn’t give him time to hold your hand one last time before you forget him all over again. It was literally like blinking and then the scenery changed before his eyes like one of those toy cameras with the pictures inside. One click and everything just changes. One moment, he feels the grip of your hand on his arm and it’s warm, comforting and makes his heart sing but then in a second, the feeling is gone, he’s cold, and he feels like he’s been punched in the gut.

With his throat drying up like sand on the shore when the water pulls away, Seven smiles bitterly. “If you do feel the same way, then remember me...” He whispered to himself.

And then suddenly, he’s back in his bunker again.

He checks the time on his phone and it’s midnight again and he’s alone once more when it was just the afternoon a few moments ago with you. With his phone in his hands, Seven grits his teeth. He was so close! You were right there next to him, on your way to find Vanderwood and take Saeran back. If he could just break the time loop he seemed to be in… if he could just manage to get something--anything--to change so a new ending will manifest. But no. Now he’s back to reading a message from Yoosung that says he’s failed one of his exams again. _Again!_

> “Hello…” You replied in the chatroom.

Seven feels his jaw relax and his whole body sinking into his chair. _At least, you come back every time._ He smiles now, a bit unhinged but unable to resist you, asking himself if he thinks he ever really can. Now he's reading your replies to the RFA members and seeing you constantly try to turn down getting involved with the organization made him laugh.

And then cry.

And before Seven realizes it, his hands are trembling as he plays along. Fingers messily gliding across his phone, trying desperately to type out the right words to reply to this conversation he doesn’t want to take part of anymore. He’s sluggishly moving towards his computer now to trace your IP address like clockwork and in seconds time, your location pings on his screen and as always, it says you are at Rika’s apartment.

Seven could feel it now unlike all the other previous versions of the 11 days playing out, this one was oddly different. In this one, Seven was tired. He was too tired to play, too tired to think, and too tired of reading your name and feeling every reply you send stab him in the chest right in the middle.

 _But of course,_ Seven cries to himself. _When I start to give up, that's when the system gets derailed. It's not when I have hope, it's when I lose it._

When he said he wanted to break the time loop, this wasn't what he meant. He didn't mean “breakdown and give up”. He desperately wanted there to be a 12th day so he wanted the algorithm to change and has been trying his best to do just that. It’s in the little things; placing his cup in different places every run of the game, rephrasing the same sentences, and eating different meals each time. So when he said he wanted to make changes, Seven didn't mean changes in himself, at least he didn’t mean starting to wish the reset affected him, too.

The conversation in the chatroom died down now and it ended with you deciding to join the RFA which splits Seven in two, nice and clean. He reminds himself it’s not your fault because you’re just playing a stupid game and that the game makes you join the RFA with no other choice. A sour taste settles in his mouth as his emotions make a downward spiral. _Can’t you just play any other game?_ He gets angered at the fact that he can’t even blame you for coming back over and over. He can’t pin anything on you and the crushing sorrow mixed with the fact that he has no one to confide it in with makes him feel so lonely.

> "Why doesn't the reset affect me? Why am I the only one?" Seven slammed a fist on his desk, rattling his keyboard and mouse. "I'm so tired. Please make me forget, too."

Seven doesn’t even know who he’s praying to right now, only that his hands are tightly clasped together, phone on his desk with the screen left on, his body leaning forward with his elbows digging into his thighs as he rocks himself back and forth.

> “Please, please…” Seven whimpers as he shakes his head slowly. “I’m so, so tired, Y/N. Just come back to me.”

Seven is trembling in frustration as well as exhaustion where he sits as he waits for the routine to click. He wishes he could just say _fuck it_ and not call you like he always does on the first day but he knows he wants to even though it will hurt when he hears the unfamiliarity in your voice. Seven will feel the pain bounce off of the walls in his heart and resonate in the pit of his stomach when he hears your voice and he's so in love with you and yet when you hear his voice, you won’t feel anything. You won't even know who he is.

Seven takes a deep breath and sits back up straight in his chair. He’s chewing on his lips as he wipes away his tears, waiting for Yoosung to finish welcoming you before he calls. It never takes too long. He can count a full 5 minutes and then he’ll call you like he always does.

In about 30 seconds, Seven will call you “for the first time”.

Seven prepares himself, scrolling through pictures he has of Elizabeth the 3rd to try and lift his spirits up. After all, isn’t this why people come to the internet? To look at cat memes, or just cats in general? Thinking about it made Seven laugh a little. _What a funny cause for the reason of the rise of the Internet,_ he thinks.

And then it was time to call you.

The line connects on the second ring and it makes Seven jolt before he remembers what he was supposed to be doing.

> _“Rrrrrrrrr… Rrrrrrrr…”_ Seven feels silly making this sound when there are tears in his eyes but his whole life has been silly so it doesn’t make him feel worse than he already does at all. If anything, it’s a good escape. _“Your bank account has been used for a fun prank. Were you aware of this?”_ Seven wipes his hands on his pants as he continues on. _“I must first verify your cell phone number for identification purposes, so please calmly follow the instructions.”_
> 
> Seven hears you gasp on the other end of the line. “Oh my gosh! What should I do? Do you want me to press my number or should I tell you? …What prank was it?”

Painful may it be for him to pretend like there was nothing between you two, he chooses to let the beautiful memories he had with you seep into him instead. _It’s not your fault,_ he reminds himself. _It’s not Y/N’s fault._

> _“My gullible… I mean, my good customer, please calm down and take a deep breath. Breathe in, breathe out!”_

Seven hears you draw in tiny breaths which makes him smile. This is when he surrenders to the algorithm. He may never get what he wants… he may never get a 12th day with you but if this is all he’ll ever get, he’ll make sure to make it count. No more trying to change the game. No more trying to break the loop. No more trying to break the system and keep you from resetting.

All that is left is trying to live life in 11 days and being okay with it.

> And so, in his best cheerful voice, he continues with his antics. _“You must keep it together at a time like this.”_ Seven says half to you and half to himself. _“Now, if you’ve taken a deep breath, please go ahead and say, ‘Honey, I love you~!’ You know, like how the teddy bears say it.”_

Seven closes his eyes, recalling all the other times he’s said he loves you and had you say it back. He tries to amplify the echoes of what that felt like so when he hears you say it with empty emotions now, it won’t hurt as much. Seven only wants to remember the words come out of your mouth the way he remembers it--full of sincerity, honesty, and affection, like you have been holding your breath waiting for your chance to tell him you love him all this time.

Seven feels new tears coming by how much his nose is stinging now. And that’s when he hears you answer.

> " _Saeyoung_ , I love you~!” He hears you say in the same tone as him.

It startles him so much that he’s now on his feet, eyes wide open. His hand slowly trembles. The grip he has on his phone is severely tight and yet his control was weak. Did he hear you right? Did you just call him by his real name? That can’t be right… _I’m just tired,_ Seven concludes as he nods his head trying to reassure himself. _Yes… yes, okay. It’s just because I’m tired._

> Seven sits back down and fakes a laugh. _“Good job! Boy…”_
> 
> “ _You’re so cute._ /You’re so cute.” Seven hears you both say at the same time.

This time, Seven gasps. The only response you give him is a hearty laugh that makes Seven’s heart beat a million times faster than it has ever had in all his life. He doesn’t understand what’s going on. How are you answering him freely? Why were you laughing right now? How could you be laughing right now?

_Do you remember everything?_

> “Not gonna say anything, huh?” Seven hears you tease him.
> 
> Seven clears his throat and readjusts himself. “W-What’s… Y/N?”

Seven goes back to his computer with his phone wedged between his cheek and shoulder as he types away, tracing your IP address. His mouth falls open as he’s staring at his screen. Nothing has changed. Your location still says you are at Rika’s apartment right now so why…?

> Seven swallows thickly and decides to take a chance. “Y/N, do you… do you remember me?”

Like a child, Seven crosses his fingers and even pinches himself before he does just to check if he was just dreaming or hallucinating right now. When he realizes he isn’t, he hears you answer him with a voice so soft and quiet he almost doesn’t hear it.

> “Yes.”
> 
> “But how?”
> 
> “Saeyoung, wait. First, I want to say I’m sorry…”
> 
> Seven wilts. “You’re sorry because you don’t actually remember me and you’re just messing with me? Y/N! This isn’t funny!” He yells at you.
> 
> “No, Saeyoung, that’s not what I’m sorry for.”
> 
> “Then what are you sorry for?!” He snaps at you. “Nothing is ever your fault, Y/N! You know how I know? Because I’ve tried to blame you a lot of times! Each time you reset and leave me at the end of the line just to be shoved into the beginning all over again, I feel the anger in me and it’s the hottest kind of anger each time.” Seven rants while he harshly clicks on his mouse to close all the tabs he had to open to trace your location. “And I want to scream at you for leaving, for resetting the game, for forgetting about the RFA, about me, but I can’t because it’s not your fault!”
> 
> Seven takes his phone from where he’s holding it against his cheek and shoulder and yells at the screen to finish his rant. “I can’t blame you because you can’t help that this is just a game you’re playing on your damn phone, so what the hell are you sorry for?!”

When Seven finishes his rant, his chest is heaving and his knuckles are white by how tightly he’s holding onto his phone that’s in front of his face right now. And then he realizes what he’s done and almost slaps himself with his own phone by how quick he brings it close to his ear. “Y/N! I’m sorry, I d-didn’t mean to yell.” Seven says all in one breath.

> It takes you about 3 more seconds before you answer. “So that’s how you feel…”

Seven sighs in relief knowing that you didn’t hang up on him. He nods his head to answer you as if you can see him.

> “I’m so sorry, Saeyoung.” He hears you sobbing now and it makes him sob, too. “It took me so long to get this right… and I’m sorry. I made you suffer so much.”
> 
> “Listen,” Seven says, wrapping both hands around his phone to try and get a grip of the situation he’s in. He has so many questions. Firstly, he wants to know how you remember him and second, he wants to know if this was a dream, again denying the reality he was living. “Y-You’re here and you remember me and that’s all that matters.”

At this point, Seven begins to understand the true meaning of the word ‘lifeline’. Nautically, he knows it’s a word for a rope or line used for life-saving. It’s thrown to someone drowning or in the water to reel themselves onto a boat. In palmistry, a lifeline was the line on one’s palm that tells them how long they have to live.

To Seven, ‘lifeline’ means you.

> “You’re angry with me…” Seven hears you think out loud.
> 
> “I am.” Seven doesn’t deny himself this. He’s allowed to be angry, wasn’t he? He’s the one who has to endure everything, get betrayed every time, and get left behind. None of these things reassured him that he _does not_ need to get angry at all.
> 
> He hears you sigh. “I knew you would be angry but I miscalculated how angry you would be.” You laugh. “Do you hate me?”

Seven immediately answers you with a harsh ‘No.’, distressed at you even asking him that.

> “I’m glad.” You say with a relieved laughter following your response. Seven hears you shuffling across the room and a soft _poof_ as he assumes you had just plopped down on your bed. “I wouldn’t be able to handle it if you did.”

Hearing how calm your voice was made Seven’s head spin so he mimics you and makes his way to his own bed, unable to wait until his body hits his mattress and his weight is taken off of his feet. He wishes he was beside you right now and you two were having this conversation in person instead of through the phone.

> “I could never hate you, Y/N.” He reassures you.
> 
> “ _I love you. Today, tomorrow… forever and ever…_ ” You quote him from one of the phone calls you had with him on the 11th day right before midnight.

Seven knows he was the one that said those words but he can’t help but get affected by it because you were saying it to him now and those words were also now for him just as much as it was for you.

> “Y/N, am I dreaming?” Seven whispers into his phone. “Do you really remember?”

He hears you giggle softly on the other end and it makes him feel warm and contained and not at all how he felt a while ago when he was feeling himself break slowly and painfully as he let everything slip through his fingers.

> “Don’t wake up, okay?” You tell him in a soft voice matching his own. “If we’re both dreaming, just stay where you are and don’t go any further.”

Once again, Seven nods his head in response even though he knows you can’t see him and he lets a few tears fall because of the headache from all the crying he did a few moments ago that was starting to ebb away slowly creep back in.

> “Saeyoung, okay?” You ask again. “Don’t you dare think about waking up.”

Seven starts to close his eyes, “O-Okay, Y/N. Okay.” He says before letting you go on and tell him that you loved him with all your heart and that you were always there for him and you never really left. Seven was slowly drifting to sleep halfway through you whispering to him that you can’t wait to see him and kiss him all over his face, to throw your arms around him and never let him go ever again.

> “Saeyoung, I love you.” He heard you say one last time before his breathing became shallow and steady.

**Author's Note:**

> OK this is my first mysme fic,, i know i like writing angst fics but out of all my favs, saeyoung is the only one i can never bring myself to hurt ;;;
> 
> i hope you all like this one! pls leave comments :)


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